How do I tell you that I am feeling a little disappointed with you lately?

How do I tell say those things that I wanted to say without hurting your feelings?

How about you use this weekend to reflect on your attitude lately?

How about you finally realize what you have been treating me?

How about you tell me what I can do instead of me guessing how you have been all the time?

How about you come forward with all that you have and be open about your mistakes?

How about you stop jumping on the cycle over and over again?

While we are at it, how about you learn from your mistakes and stop repeating them and regretting it?

How about for once you grow up and think for yourself without the influence of your so-called friends?

How about you stop being selfish all the time by thinking that I will be here whenever you needed me?

How about you stop being this little irritant and start being responsible for all the irresponsible deed?

How about you step up and start being those things you said you wannabe?

How about you stop for a minute and realize that all of you are straying away?

How about you stop turning your back on me whenever you did something out of the ordinary thinking I’ll think lowly of you? – And you say I JUDGE you?

How about having a little faith in me? – If you don’t trust me, at least have faith in me.

I am so proud of your achievements so far.

I am so proud of you.

I love you.

I wanna be there for you.

I know I am not perfect nor a good friend.

I know I don’t have anything nice to say to make things better or have solutions to all of your life problem.

However, I am so close to saying, “I’m Done.”

what I meant was..

you asked me what do I mean when I said u were disrespectful to women.

yes u love women. U can love them will all your heart. But loving them does not mean u respect them at the same time.

respect is

... keeping whatever conversation you have with her secret when she asked you to.

... doing whatever things with her a secret when she asked you to.

... not abusing her trust she have in you.

and many more...

you go figure k?

Enough already.. :)

Still having signs of withdrawal... But since it's the first day of work since I left for Brisbane... The sympthoms will fade soon... but the memories will forever stay... Thank you Amin, Nor and Fizah for those great times in Brisbane...

Okie world... I'm ready...

looking like a fucking idiot...

every time we get something new... or going thru a new experience esp if it's something positive, we tend to spend more time on it.... until it's just another routine...

it happens to everyone... no one is an exception...

I'm done explaining every single entry I made. It's either you get it.. or you don't...

what?

Here I am. All prep up to do a proper blog entry. Hooked my mac up to my TV and keyboard and hard drive all... but i am drawing a blank.

Oh... pussycat dolls just came up on my screen...

...wait a minute...

i miss them so much....

mixed

You know that kind of feeling you get at the bottom of your stomach right after you heard a bad news or unwelcomed surprise? For example when if you are a big fan of MJ and that the fact that his death hasn't sunk in yet? Or you are a big fan of Newcastle United and how you felt when they were relegated next season? Or when you come to a realisation that you are not able to take up a new challenge or handle a perfectly fucked-up situation? Or that you just can't handle emotions properly? That kind of feeling where you knew you had tried your best but the right people doesn't seem impressed with the result? Or that feeling when I had when Nini left to work in AUH? And that same feeling came back this year when Amin left to study in Brisbane? And the same feeling return when I had to walk thru those gates that says Departing Passengers Only" last night at Brisbane Airport.

oh wait... I forget. I am just a normal human being who knew people who aren't like me. No that does not make me feel special. There are people who care and there are people who doesn't. If only I could spot the difference.

All I want to say is, if I can feel this much emotion right now, will I be able to feel again when I fly...??